Recent Columns


Classic '98: Trains, planes, dog food
This Dave Barry column was originally published Sunday, February 1, 1998. The 1998 Winter Olympics will be held in Nagano, Japan, which was selected by the International Olympic Committee on … Click to Continue ».Read>>

Classic '98: Bon Appetit

Cooking was invented in prehistoric times, when a primitive tribe had a lucky accident. The tribe had killed an animal and was going to eat it raw, when a tribe member named Woog tripped and dropped it into the fire. At first, the other tribe members were angry at Woog, but then, as the aroma of burning meat filled the air, they had an idea. So they ate Woog raw.

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Classic '98: Keeping abreast of the news

Recently, one of our local TV news shows in Miami did a special investigative report on -- I swear -- brassiere sizes. The station promoted this report relentlessly for several days. Every few minutes, you would hear an announcer's voice saying, with an urgency appropriate for imminent nuclear attack: ''ARE YOU WEARING THE WRONG BRA SIZE?'' You would have thought that women were dropping dead in the street by the thousands as a result of improperly sized brassieres. I was becoming genuinely concerned about this problem, despite the fact that, except on very special occasions involving schnapps, I don't even ''wear'' a brassiere.

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Classic '98: Resolve to be a better person -- someone else
This Dave Barry column was originally published Sunday, January 4, 1998. Right now, while you're still burping up little gaseous reminders of the estimated 78 cheese puffs you consumed on … Click to Continue ».Read>>

Classic '97: Mr. Language Person solves your weird word problems

Once again, our glands are swollen with pride as we present ''Ask Mister Language Person,'' the column that answers your common questions about grammar, punctuation and sheep diseases. Mister Language Person is the only authority who has been formally recognized by the American Association of English Teachers On Medication. (''Hey!'' were their exact words. ''It's YOU!'')

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For more recent columns, visit Dave's page at the Miami Herald.

Selected Columns 2008 - 2011

2008

Dave Goes to the Conventions

RNC

1 - Eyeballs on the Prize
2 - There's a Party Going on Right He....shhhh!
3 - They Hear You Knockin'...But You Can't Come In

4 - The Feminine Mystique?
5 - Don't Fence Me In

DNC

1 - Mile-High Drama
2 - Denver - It's Not Easy Being Green
3 - The Floor Exercise
4 - Green Grow the Lileks
5 - The Great State of Whatever

Dave's Olympic Coverage

1 - Lost in Translation
2 - Is This Wall Great or What?

3 - Tastes Like Chicken

4 - Dave Gets Around
5 - A Night At The Opera
6 - The Name Game
7 - This Little Columnist Goes to Market
8 - Are You Ready to Rock and Roll?

9 - The City of Harmonious Harmony
10 - Beijing: It's Been Real

More 2008 Columns:

Dave and the Dolphins (June)

Miami Drivers (April)

Dave Hits the Silver Screen (April)

Dave Does His Taxes (April)

Florida's Presidential Primary - Voting Method (March)

Dave's World - The Colonoscopy (Feb.)

Florida's Presidential Primary - South Beach (Feb.)

 

2009

For Classic columns see Dave's Herald column page

Book excerpts from I'll Mature When I'm Dead:

Health care

24 script

Miami and murder

The Inaugural Parade (2009)

Dave Covers The Super Bowl: Miami Visitors' Guide

2010

A tiger escapes from Jungle Island

Dave goes On Safari

Dave goes to The World Cup

Dave does football (soccer)

Dave's 2010 Holiday Gift Guide (12/4)

Dave's 2010 Year In Review (1/2/11)

2011

Dave smells a rat -- no, really - 2/12/11

Dave goes to a Barry Manilow concert

2010 Year in Review (1-1-11)